Regardless of anything else that happens in the daily news, Americans want to know where Sarah Palin is located and what she is doing. Barack Obama is running a distant second to Sarah's popularity; Joe Biden's secret service detail draws more attention than his candidacy, and that detail outnumbers onlookers at most of his rallies. That other guy in the race (McCain) should just sit on the sideline and smile.
I have often wondered if McCain really chose Palin all by himself. Someone commented the other day that his wife, Cindy, kept pointing John toward Palin as his running mate. McCain advisers seriously considered a woman for the ticket only after Obama passed over Hillary as his running mate. Most of the McCain people thought a woman would not make a difference for the better. The general consensus was that no well-known woman existed who would boost the ticket. They were right about the well-known part.
Work with me here. McCain had help in picking Sarah Palin and I feel certain it was from his wife. If he gets into the Oval Office he owes Cindy McCain at least one bouquet of flowers. Cindy is not an excitable woman. She is very classy, very intelligent and very pretty, but she does not show a lot of emotion; with one exception and that exception was after Palin's speech at the convention. Cindy showed more excitement for Palin's speech than she did for her husband's speech. Of course, so did everyone else in the convention center.
So, like everyone else I want to know where Sarah is today and has she said anything noteworthy. I am positive that Barack Obama is trying to decide what shade of lipstick looks best on a pig, Joe Biden is trying to keep from smelling like a pig and John McCain is just happy that Sarah Palin wears lipstick…any color she chooses.
Sarah can speak the most obvious of observations and make them sound profound. Today she remarked that our economy is in shambles. You think? Sarah said it so it must be true. Okay, there are quite a few people who already know our economy is on a downward slope; actually I think it has rolled down the hill with the force of an avalanche. The fact that she agrees just confirms it for me.
I wish she did not agree and could convince me that I am wrong. Unfortunately, she confirmed what I already knew, but she did it in a way that leans toward optimism for the future. Barack Obama is not hopeful, but knows for sure our current issues are the fault of George Bush. Barack should probably focus on his current opponent. George is leaving in January. Perhaps Obama did not get the memo.
John McCain believes he can fix everything, but is leaving it up to Sarah Palin to communicate that fix to the American voting public. I am starting to believe this man is a genius. He apparently does know when to speak and when to close his mouth.
As for Joe Biden; here are a couple of things to avoid in future campaigns. I feel certain Sarah would recommend these things so we will say that they are Sarah's suggestions. It makes me feel like one of her campaign managers to attribute suggestions to her. Maybe she will read this column and I will be in a new job tomorrow. Perhaps I should be thankful that I have a job tomorrow in light of Sarah's acknowledgment about the economy.
For Joe, here are Sarah's suggestions. Tell potential voters that you are the person for the job, not Hillary Clinton. Then try to shy away from asking a wheelchair bound person you claim as a best friend to stand up at your rally. That blunder left an odor that deodorant will not cover up. It's that swine thing again and we all know from Barack, even lipstick on a pig does not help.
Here is my personal piece of advice, because I like Joe Biden. I would hate to pass him on the street and not recognize the man. Granted, that secret service detail around him right now would draw some attention; but perhaps a name tag would help. I know a lot of guys named Joe, my father's name was Joe. So that last name on the tag would help. Of course, Joe is the expert who knows best; I am just offering a suggestion.
