If I was to say I was getting married, generally I am sure that the reaction would be nothing more than shock, devastation and probably endless rants at my foolishness and naivety. Obviously this is not the standard reaction when one announces the good news, instead the orthodox reaction (hopefully) is congratulations. However the reason that I may gain this reaction if I were to disclose such information would be due to my fairly "young" age.
However I would like to broach the question, when did it become so controversial to get married before you twenties or even, in fact your thirties? I assume that the logical and mathematical answer would be that statistics show us that two in four or three in four marriages end in divorce, either way the percentage for surviving and hopefully fulfilling a happy marriages is rather low. This fact is not only scary, especially for those about to tie the knot, but also I think is really rather depressing.
Maybe I am too much of an optimist or maybe we are generating a society of pessimists, who, having read the statistics may assume that it is safer in the end, to save the heartbreak, and endless money that divorce costs and therefore not get married at all. I have come to believe that my mother is one of society's pessimists. She is all too ready to assure me and give me her worldly advice that marriage is too much hard work and therefore not worth the hassle. Now of course, she has a far greater experience than I do, whilst my rather innocent self has no real idea of the day to day strain that life and society holds over a couple. Whilst being an optimist I am not therefore rendered oblivious to the fact that the fast deteriorating economy can only adds to the stress that puts a strain on marriage, plus the norm of having to cook the dinner, do the washing, clean the house and look after the children, leaving absolutely no time for the so craved "alone" time.
I have no doubt therefore that marriage is a difficult and challenging a "lifetime experience" shall we say, but does that therefore mean that it is outdated? Should we be so easily shunned into believing that it is better to be the modern career women than it is to set up house? The Younger generation seem to think so according to statistics in Stella Magazine whilst the older generation appear to argue the opposite.
Maybe this new found view that marriage is outdated is due to the fast food-esque economy that we live in, where time is not of the essence but time in some cases is simply nonexistent. Romance, along with the dinosaurs seems to be becoming extinct mostly due the lack of time that our society and the home/work balance provides us. Maybe it would be fair to suggest that we are all so desperate to enhance our careers that we forget to slave in the same way when it comes to relationships and marriage. The older generation lived in a more conventionally divided society, where the majority of women were home makers and men the bread winners. However this situation appears to have been reversed where it is now not controversial to be a woman and go out to work whilst balancing family life but to do the opposite and merely stay at home.
Obviously it is easy for me to sit here analysing society through my young and inexperienced eyes whilst having no real conception of the reality itself, but still I feel that each and every one of us can judge for ourselves.
My grandparents were together nearly 75 years or thereabouts, literally a lifetime. There story goes that one day my grandpa climbed upon a bus saw my nana and decided she was the one, and therefore they spent a whole bus journey together missing both their stops and it was literally as simple as that. After they consummated their relationship he went to war, and when hospitalised in London she ran through the Blitz to see him. If that is not romance than I do not know what is. She married then at the age of nineteen and after that they built a life together, idyllic as it may seem it is also true. Nowadays one would be lucky if a man snuck you a cheeky grin on the bus let alone starting up a conversation. Is this due to our lack of time or simply disbelief in love at first sight?
In my humble and somewhat naïve opinion I would choose to believe that marriage is not necessarily outdate but that our fast moving lifestyles may be leaving little time for the romantic courting and melodramatic highs and lows described by the romantic poets and writers of era's before us.
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