Are American citizens really to lazy to walk to the phone to call in an order for delivery. The phone is most households is only 5 - 10 feet away from all Television sets in the household. Although TiVo subscribers pay for service, this measure has gone way to far. According to Rob Weisberg, vice president of marketing for dominos, “This is the first time in history that the "on-demand" generation will be able to fully experience couch commerce by ordering pizza directly through their television sets.” (taken from BusinessWeek)

“COUCH COMMERCE”, only in America would people invent such a term. People will continue to get obese, and many children may not live passed the age of their parents, which is a sad realization as the expected age of life has been rising for decades, The 2000 - 2010 decade is by far the worst the world (America in specific) has seen in loss of life due to obesity. Dominos and TiVo have basically teamed up to murder many people due to the fact of their laziness. However the US population can only see this as a white collar crime, and nothing will be done to stop this, as long as two companies are making money.

The TiVo Dominos service is scheduled to go into full effect later this week.

Who my favorite candidate was is not important - just living and breathing the campaigns was exciting. I was truly amazed at how the cable networks could take one story, play it all day and keep it alive for days.

Will I ever see Joe Lieberman at the side of Senator McCain again, whispering corrections in his ear while at a press conference?

Will Hillary ever tell her harrowing story of landing "under fire" again?

Obama laid out his plans for improving the country. According to McCain the plans made Obama a "socialist" and according to some of his supporters even a communist. Still, I wonder what McCain"s plan for improving the nation's economic situation would have been? Oh yeah, Bushism.

With Governor Palin snuggly back in Alaska, what is going to happen to Tina Fey? Is she doomed to obscurity? And what about Saturday Night Live? Should they brace themselves for a huge drop in ratings?

Of course, "Joe the Plumber" is in deep trouble. His fifteen minutes of fame are over, his candidate lost, he will most likely have to get a plumbing license, the IRS knows where to find him and absolutely no one cares what he has to say.

The pundits and the commentators will soon be at a loss for material when completing their analysis of the campaign. Will they miss the magic maps as much as I will?

The ending of the campaign did turn out to prove that American democracy was alive, well and maturing. But, with the campaign over I sure am going to miss the discussions of the really important news stories on cable TV.

Cool chick, writing warrior and friend, Blogging Naveen, recently shared Campbell Brown’s fabulous commentary, So what if Obama were a Muslim or an Arab?  It’s worth the read, but, should you be short on time, the title alone communicates the crux of the message, “When did Arab and Muslim become dirty words?”  

Sure, in 1961 some people thought being Catholic would be an insurmountable barrier to the White House.  0bviously, JFK’s win proved it was not.  And now it seems, I don’t know, silly or crazy, to think that anyone was even concerned.  But they were.  Catholicism and potential ties to the Vatican were feared.  Unnecessarily.  It leaves me sad to think that in the last 40+ years instead of becoming more enlightened we’ve just switched up which religion we slander.  Brown eloquently and accurately points out that, “we've all been too quick to accept the idea that calling someone Muslim is a slur.”

I consider one of the best hours of television to be the West Wing episode that followed 9/11.  It was simple, yet profound.  When I hear ‘Muslim’ or ‘Arab’ so casually used and accepted as a means to diminish or malign I think of the mess hall scene.  The White House has been attacked and is in lockdown.  Josh and Donna are left to entertain a group of touring teens who are trying to understand the events of the day.  Josh explains to his room full of students (and a home audience of xenophobes) that radical Muslims who support jihad against America, or Islamic extremists, are to Islam as the KKK is to Christianity.  Meaning, they are both fringe elements. 

Now, I don’t know any KKK members (that I’m aware of!) but I know a heck of a lot of Christians and I wonder, how would you feel, if every time someone referred to you as a Christian, the implication was that you might be a Klan member?  I know it’s an absurd idea, but so is the implication that being Muslim is an automatic link terrorism.

Sigh.

Yeah, yeah, I know.  Obama is Christian, not Muslim.  But, so what if he were?

I miss the days of the good Emmy shows with hosts like Johnny Carson. Those were the days before acceptance speeches were whittled down to forty-five seconds and the winner would thank everyone from the producers to the writers, from the co-stars to family members, from Hosea to Cleveland Amory, from their first grade teacher to their lucky shower cap. With acceptance speeches like that, it was no wonder the Emmy Awards would end close enough to preempt Captain Kangaroo.

I remember seeing Dick Van Dyke winning for Best Actor in a Comedy Series. I can still see the surprise look on his face when his name was called, his genuine adoration for his cast and crew as he wept through his acceptance speech and the reflection of the lights, glaring back at the camera lens, off the trophy.

That's when I decided I wanted one of those. I wanted to stand in front of my peers and knock off some well prepared, glib remarks about show business. I wanted to thank everyone under the sun for making that moment special. I even wrote my acceptance speech that night.

Unfortunately, my acting career came to an abrupt halt after an insensitive director, at a community theater audition for The Odd Couple, told me that my dramatic ability could only be compared to that of Lawrence. “Olivier?” I inquired. “No. Moe and Curly's sidekick,” was his response.

I was surprised. I thought my reading of Oscar Madison was riveting. The director agreed that “it was similar to being fastened to a girder with red, hot bolts of metal.”

As I sat in the audience and watched the performance of The Odd Couple (Billy Kunkle, the director's live-in secretary got the part of Oscar), I noticed the laughs it was getting. The rhythm that Neil Simon had going with his words was pure magic. Every line was a gem. That's when I noted that any live-in secretary could be an actor, but to be able to create these lines and such interesting characters was the true challenge.

It was then that I decided to hell with acting, I'm going to become a writer. I'm going to get my Emmy by writing a fantastic script or a popular series.

I began writing scripts for all the popular shows of the time: Murphy Brown, Home Improvement, The Wonder Years, Coach, Wings, Frasier. My aspirations soared when I got an agent interested in my work. However, my aspirations plummeted when it was discovered that my agent was jailed for Income Tax evasion and probably wouldn't be out until the "98-"99 season.

Fast forward to this year. Another year has come and gone and my mantle is still empty. Well, there's a pair of bookends without any books between them, and a ceramic bust of someone who is supposed to be Mark Twain, but looks more like Don King, however, no Emmy.

So, just in case my time to jump up with delight and weep openly at the Awards Ceremonies never comes, I would like for you to hear my acceptance speech.

First, I would start off by saying, “I'm going to avoid all the old clichés and simply say that I would like to thank the Academy, the hard working producers, actors and crew of (NAME OF SHOW TO BE FILLED IN HERE) for all their support. It's an honor just to have been nominated. To those of you who were nominated with me, I share this award with you. It's a pleasure to be nominated in such wonderfully talented company. My thanks to my mother and father for having me, my wife for encouraging me, and my agent for making bail. Receiving this award means you like me; you really, really like me.

Before I go, there is one person I would really like to thank, someone who helped me early in my career. I would like to thank the lady at the Quickie Print Copy Shop for making copies of my spec scripts to send to agents. What's that? Yes, forty-five seconds do go rather quickly, Mr. Probst. Thanks again. I love you all.”

Okay, so maybe I won't get an Emmy for best writer. So, maybe I am wasting my time trying to tackle such a competitive market. Wait! Do they give Emmys to gaffers? What is a gaffer anyway? How about best boy? That sounds like something I can do. The nominations for Best Best Boy are...

Don't believe everything you read

We have all come to realize over the years that much of what we read in newspapers is not actually news. Some newspapers are nothing more than instruments used by political parties to shape the minds of citizens whose votes they seek at election time. Other newspapers are really just cheap celebrity rags that focus on stories that relate to shallow people in the public eye. There might be a war raging in Iraq or a hurricane causing havoc, but you will invariably find celebrities dominating the front pages while real news is consigned to ca few columns on the inside pages.

What might be presented as news is often no more than the personal opinions of either a columnist or of the editor. Some in the public eye have made the mistake of criticizing the press and opened up a can of worms for themselves as the newspaper seeks revenge by exposing any lurid details they can unearth.

Real news on the Internet

The Internet has taken the place of newspapers for some former readers who have had their fill of reading some of the nonsense printed in the name of news. Go online and you can find the facts of news items through genuine news agencies who focus on happenings rather than the people who might be involved, celebrity or not. Sure you will find as much celebrity tat on the Internet as you will in the newspapers but at least you have a greater choice when seeking news.

We have always been warned not to believe everything we read and a mild review of some of the "news stories" of the past decades just confirm that newspapers have long lost their identity as instruments that convey news. Too many have become celebrity rags that appeal more to shallow people who perhaps want to avoid hearing real news stories for one reason or another.

Phil McGraw is a multi-millionaire whose fifteen minutes of fame overstayed its welcome to thirty minutes. He has made more money than he needs in his lifetime if he uses it wisely. Reportedly his income for most of the past decade topped thirty million per year. I could survive on that and afford to take the love of my life, Deborah, to the movies a couple of times each month… we would go for the discount matinees of course and be frugal, sneaking in our snacks and drinks.

Back to Phil McGraw; the man is his own worst enemy. The surprise is that he was able to sell himself to Oprah Winfrey, Match.com and many other people given his life's issues before he was famous. If you read the public record with respect to his past you learn that Phil McGraw was infamous before he was famous.

You know Oprah's staff did their homework, so she was aware of his past when she made him famous. Casting him on her show as a relationship expert was an economic decision on her part. It had nothing to do with credentials and it certainly ignored some blatant horrific facts about his lifestyle. She made a business decision and her production team sold it, making millions. Am I jealous? Yes! I want to be her partner!

Apparently Phil's current wife is tired of the womanizing and his controlling nature. Geez lady, did it take this long to get tired of him or did you just realize that your share of the money will last you for the rest of your life, without him?

Believe me, this writer is not defending Phil, but I do question the I. Q. of Mrs. McGraw. She is only now realizing what everyone else knew all along? I have a feeling she knew all along but picked the best time to take the most money, which puts her in a class with Oprah Winfrey as a very good business woman. Maybe the I.Q. is not in question?

There is no doubt that Mrs. McGraw can do and should do what no one else has done; she can and should throw him under the bus. He can retire and live off the millions he will have after his wife takes her share. He may have to do that. If she tells all he will lose his show and his endorsements.

Putting a positive spin on those losses, he will have time to spend helping Britney Spears with her issues. After all he is her therapist is he not? Oh wait, the claim he made about being her therapist and her being a guest on his show was a lie he told. We are going to have to work harder to put a positive spin on this.

I wonder if he has tried selling used cars; my apologies to used car salesmen for classing him with them. Perhaps he could use his talents to sell something like the Shamwow? He has the qualities I see in Vince, the Shamwow guy on television. Phil would be great at that “but wait” part; more products for only $19.95, plus shipping and handling.

There has to be a company out there looking for a television mouth piece to sell stuff that Wal-Mart will not even sell and Wal-Mart will sell just about anything. If Wal-Mart will not sell it… let's not go there, Phil might need a job soon, so be on the lookout for that company in need of his mouth.

Phil McGraw is coming full-circle, from sleaze to stardom and back to sleaze. Actually, he never left the sleaze, but packaging did hide it long enough for him and others to make millions off of him.

Dr. Phil's sleazy career as a relationship expert may end soon, but he will find a new career. Professional wrestling is the perfect career for his ego and his overloaded mouth. I am onto something here. Oprah, can I have a piece of this deal?

I am looking forward to it. The digital channels that we get now are only due because of a strong antenna and a digital TV. But those channels are great regarding picture quality and sound. We don't have cable, but with the change coming, we may finally be ushered into the digital age and I cannot wait.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not a TV junkie. More oft than not, I find other things to do to occupy my time, such as writing or reading. When I do watch television, I try to avoid the mainstream networks, with a few exceptions. Mostly I watch PBS.

With having cable, I'll have the enjoyment of having the History Channel at my beck and call, along with TLC and the Discovery Channel as well as National Geographic. And of course, being a movie buff, I'll have movie channels to view as well. The only disappointment I'll suffer will be that with a basic cable package, I won't get BBC America.

The only obstacle that we'll face will be the dilemma of whether the cable company will be willing to come out to us. We live in the country, and those that live in the country are notorious for being left out of the loop with certain amenities. We don't always have the option of getting natural gas to heat and cool our homes, and cable is another iffy. And if cable does come out to us here in the sticks, I don't see us having a lot of choices as to who our carrier will be. As of right now I think Time Warner is the only one that is willing to carry out this far, but maybe not to us.

Personally, despite my excitement to finally have cable, is that I haven't seen any justification for switching everything over. Granted, digital TV is great and has its advantages, but I haven't seen why this is happening. It seems that this crept up out of nowhere and now everyone is clamoring about, making sure that all of us switch over.

Even though I haven't seen anything on TV to explain why this is going to happen, I'm going to make sure I switch over, even if I don't get my BBC America.

In the past in order to be famous or even infamous, major news media outlets all had to agree that your content was worthy of the small amount of space available on the evening news. You needed a record deal to produce and release main stream music, a contract with a major movie studio to appear in a film or a story so amazing that it would be written about in the local or maybe national newspaper.

Now with the tremendous success of reality television and the advances of the internet and computers, you can simply photograph or video yourself, often using your home computer or inexpensive digital camera, and post it anywhere on the internet for all to see. You can also be captured on surveillance cameras doing all sorts of things you would not have been seen doing previously and billions of dollars have been made taping the escapades of college girls during their spring break drunkenness.

When anyone can be infamous for just about anything what in the years to come will be the new definition of "celebrity"? My guess is that it will be anyone who manages not to permanently sabotage their dignity in Cyberspace by getting caught or posting things that, years from now, they will regret and would likely rather forget they had done.

In the past in order to be famous or even infamous, major news media outlets all had to agree that your content was worthy of the small amount of space available on the evening news. You needed a record deal to produce and release main stream music, a contract with a major movie studio to appear in a film or a story so amazing that it would be written about in the local or maybe national newspaper.

Now with the tremendous success of reality television and the advances of the internet and computers, you can simply photograph or video yourself, often using your home computer or inexpensive digital camera, and post it anywhere on the internet for all to see. You can also be captured on surveillance cameras doing all sorts of things you would not have been seen doing previously and billions of dollars have been made taping the escapades of college girls during their spring break drunkenness.

When anyone can be infamous for just about anything what in the years to come will be the new definition of "celebrity"? My guess is that it will be anyone who manages not to permanently sabotage their dignity in Cyberspace by getting caught or posting things that, years from now, they will regret and would likely rather forget they had done.

To that, I ask…WHY? Why are we so surprised?

A Child Star, Alone?

Miley was not alone on this photo shoot. As a former model and current photographer, I know how frequently parents are all over the set and can try to take over a photo shoot. Miley's parents, and Miley herself, are said to have approved the photo. Everyone commented on how beautiful the picture looked and now, it's a scandal.

Racy Photos on the Internet: Not Enough?

Miley has a few photos already circling the Internet, which show her to be slightly left of wholesome. Perhaps her candid snapshots, which were “leaked” to the Internet, were not gaining enough attention?

Obviously, the young Cyrus can safely damage her wholesome image without the assistance of a well-known photographer.

Ratings Booster?

Plenty of child stars have made a rocky transition into adulthood. For example, Britney Spears. In fact, this Miley scandal reminds me of when Britney suddenly had a new figure. Britney's ratings soared when she became a bit more bouncy on the upper torso. Parents, on the other hand, banned their children from attending Britney concerts and buying her CD's. Does that sound familiar to some of the news stories at this very moment? In fact, if you didn't know who Miley Cyrus was this morning, you certainly know who she is, now!

Annie Liebovitz: Pornographer?

Anyone who has studied Annie Liebovitz's photography knows that she poses celebrities in unique positions, often nude. Perhaps hiring Ms. Liebovitz was a bit premature for the young Cyrus's career? Additionally, Vanity Fair isn't exactly known for their wholesome farm scenes. They like to be on the cutting edge of controversy. Remember Demi Moore?

Are We too Prudish about Some Things and not Enough about Others?

This situation raises a few more questions about Americans and the contradictory morals we try to uphold.

I'm an American. I like art. There's a lot of art that contains nudity. Where do we draw the line between art and pornography? When does the human body, posed, become shameful? Only recently have we begun to put age limits on what we consider “obscene.”

Teachers have been fired for taking their students to the art museum and exposing children to nude statues or paintings. Yet, Victoria's Secret can prance nearly nude models across our television during Wheel of Fortune. Have you watched MTV, lately? There's a lot more showing on that channel than Miley Cyrus's bare back! Maybe it's time to choose our battles a bit more wisely when it comes to wholesome entertainment?

The Miley Cyrus photo is a big deal because we've made it a big deal. Personally, I think Cyrus has a bad case of Kool-aid mouth in Annie's photo, not to mention, others that have posed in the same manner. Sure, it's a beautiful photo, but…sorry, Ms. Liebovitz, it's not your best work. Although, it may become one of your most well known.